A lot of people say their mom is cool, but I really have a cool mom. As far as Mom goes, I hit the lottery.
She is the one who taught me the facts of life, like telling me that when I was ready for sex I could always do it in my home, where I would feel safe. When I started dating, she would stay up late with me one night and google the best latex free condom. She always accompanies me to my OB-GYN meetings to ease my anxiety, and when I live with endometriosis and what it means for my well-being, my career, and my sex life. She is a rock to me.
It’s also because I do what I do, because I believe, above all, that abortion is freedom and that as a society we never see equality without access for all. Will get
You see, I was a child when my mother explained to me abortion.
We were on vacation, and the car parked next to us had a bumper sticker about abortion. I was curious, so I asked what that meant.
When we were growing up my mother always had a rule about these things: never teach your children what you have to teach them, and never lie. Just state that they understand. To this day, she still cries out about a friend of mine in the second grade that a condom is a tampon. What would her parents be thinking with this explanation?
But I do remember that abortion is obvious. We were unpacking after a long day on our way to our room when I asked what an abortion meant.
“Abortion is a procedure that a pregnant woman has when she no longer wants to get pregnant,” she began. “And it doesn’t hurt the child because the child isn’t really a child. And that means if someone wants to be a parent, they can decide to do it when they’re ready.”
I don’t remember exactly how old I was, maybe in middle school. But even at that age, my mother’s explanation made perfect sense. It was simple. Why would anyone be against it? And truth be told, I still don’t understand why people make abortion so complicated – it’s so basic, so obviously for the physical autonomy and self-determination of people who can get pregnant.
My mom teaches me a lot of creative things, lots of lessons that tell me how to live my life, and what kind of person I am and what I hope to be.
But the two most important things are what it means to be a mother and what it means to support abortion. And it shows me that the two are intertwined – you can’t really be a good parent, you can’t show your children the world with your own eyes, if that world doesn’t include reproductive freedom for all.
My biggest hope in life is that one day I can be the mother she is to me and I can show my children what it means to love and support her as she always did Is and still does. And I hope that one day I will have the opportunity to explain to my children what an abortion is, just as my mother did for me.
As an adult, I still come back to this explanation to ground myself – to remind me why I do this. It’s simple and honest.
And it makes me really thankful that my mother chose to keep me.